Sept. 23rd. - Our guests arrived about three weeks ago. Lord andLady Lowborough have now been married above eight months; and Iwill do the lady the credit to say that her husband is quite analtered man; his looks, his spirits, and his temper, are allperceptibly changed for the better since I last saw him. But thereis room for improvement still. He is not always cheerful, noralways contented, and she often complains of his ill-humour, which,however, of all persons, she ought to be the last to accuse him of,as he never displays it against her, except for such conduct aswould provoke a saint. He adores her still, and would go to theworld's end to please her. She knows her power, and she uses ittoo; but well knowing that to wheedle and coax is safer than tocommand, she judiciously tempers her despotism with flattery andblandishments enough to make him deem himself a favoured and ahappy man.

But she has a way of tormenting him, in which I am a fellow-sufferer, or might be, if I chose to regard myself as such. Thisis by openly, but not too glaringly, coquetting with Mr.Huntingdon, who is quite willing to be her partner in the game; butI don't care for it, because, with him, I know there is nothing butpersonal vanity, and a mischievous desire to excite my jealousy,and, perhaps, to torment his friend; and she, no doubt, is actuatedby much the same motives; only, there is more of malice and less ofplayfulness in her manoeuvres. It is obviously, therefore, myinterest to disappoint them both, as far as I am concerned, bypreserving a cheerful, undisturbed serenity throughout; and,accordingly, I endeavour to show the fullest confidence in myhusband, and the greatest indifference to the arts of my attractiveguest. I have never reproached the former but once, and that wasfor laughing at Lord Lowborough's depressed and anxious countenanceone evening, when they had both been particularly provoking; andthen, indeed, I said a good deal on the subject, and rebuked himsternly enough; but he only laughed, and said, - 'You can feel forhim, Helen, can't you?'

'I can feel for anyone that is unjustly treated,' I replied, 'and Ican feel for those that injure them too.'

'Why, Helen, you are as jealous as he is!' cried he, laughing stillmore; and I found it impossible to convince him of his mistake.So, from that time, I have carefully refrained from any notice ofthe subject whatever, and left Lord Lowborough to take care ofhimself. He either has not the sense or the power to follow myexample, though he does try to conceal his uneasiness as well as hecan; but still, it will appear in his face, and his ill-humour willpeep out at intervals, though not in the expression of openresentment - they never go far enough for that. But I confess I dofeel jealous at times, most painfully, bitterly so; when she singsand plays to him, and he hangs over the instrument, and dwells uponher voice with no affected interest; for then I know he is reallydelighted, and I have no power to awaken similar fervour. I canamuse and please him with my simple songs, but not delight himthus.

28th. - Yesterday, we all went to the Grove, Mr. Hargrave's much-neglected home. His mother frequently asks us over, that she mayhave the pleasure of her dear Walter's company; and this time shehad invited us to a dinner-party, and got together as many of thecountry gentry as were within reach to meet us. The entertainmentwas very well got up; but I could not help thinking about the costof it all the time. I don't like Mrs. Hargrave; she is a hard,pretentious, worldly-minded woman. She has money enough to livevery comfortably, if she only knew how to use it judiciously, andhad taught her son to do the same; but she is ever straining tokeep up appearances, with that despicable pride that shuns thesemblance of poverty as of a shameful crime. She grinds herdependents, pinches her servants, and deprives even her daughtersand herself of the real comforts of life, because she will notconsent to yield the palm in outward show to those who have threetimes her wealth; and, above all, because she is determined hercherished son shall be enabled to 'hold up his head with thehighest gentlemen in the land.' This same son, I imagine, is a manof expensive habits, no reckless spendthrift and no abandonedsensualist, but one who likes to have 'everything handsome abouthim,' and to go to a certain length in youthful indulgences, not somuch to gratify his own tastes as to maintain his reputation as aman of fashion in the world, and a respectable fellow among his ownlawless companions; while he is too selfish to consider how manycomforts might be obtained for his fond mother and sisters with themoney he thus wastes upon himself: as long as they can contrive tomake a respectable appearance once a year, when they come to town,he gives himself little concern about their private stintings andstruggles at home. This is a harsh judgment to form of 'dear,noble-minded, generous-hearted Walter,' but I fear it is too just.

Mrs. Hargrave's anxiety to make good matches for her daughters ispartly the cause, and partly the result, of these errors: bymaking a figure in the world, and showing them off to advantage,she hopes to obtain better chances for them; and by thus livingbeyond her legitimate means, and lavishing so much on theirbrother, she renders them portionless, and makes them burdens onher hands. Poor Milicent, I fear, has already fallen a sacrificeto the manoeuvrings of this mistaken mother, who congratulatesherself on having so satisfactorily discharged her maternal duty,and hopes to do as well for Esther. But Esther is a child as yet,a little merry romp of fourteen: as honest-hearted, and asguileless and simple as her sister, but with a fearless spirit ofher own, that I fancy her mother will find some difficulty inbending to her purposes.