I was following the Vice-Warden, but, on second thoughts, went after myLady, being curious to see how she would manage to keep the childrenout of sight.

I found her holding Sylvie's hand, and with her other hand strokingBruno's hair in a most tender and motherly fashion: both children werelooking bewildered and half-frightened.

"My own darlings," she was saying, "I've been planning a little treatfor you! The Professor shall take you a long walk into the woods thisbeautiful evening: and you shall take a basket of food with you, andhave a little picnic down by the river!"

Bruno jumped, and clapped his hands. "That are nice!" he cried."Aren't it, Sylvie?"

Sylvie, who hadn't quite lost her surprised look, put up her mouth fora kiss. "Thank you very much," she said earnestly.

My Lady turned her head away to conceal the broad grin of triumph thatspread over her vast face, like a ripple on a lake. "Little simpletons!"she muttered to herself, as she marched up to the house.I followed her in.

"Quite so, your Excellency," the Baron was saying as we entered theLibrary. "All the infantry were under my command." He turned, and wasduly presented to my Lady.

"A military hero?" said my Lady. The fat little man simpered."Well, yes," he replied, modestly casting down his eyes."My ancestors were all famous for military genius."

My Lady smiled graciously. "It often runs in families," she remarked:"just as a love for pastry does."

The Baron looked slightly offended, and the Vice-Warden discreetlychanged the subject. "Dinner will soon be ready," he said. "May I havethe honour of conducting your Adiposity to the guest-chamber?"

"Certainly, certainly!" the Baron eagerly assented. "It would never doto keep dinner waiting!" And he almost trotted out of the room afterthe Vice-Warden.

He was back again so speedily that the Vice-warden had barely time toexplain to my Lady that her remark about "a love for pastry" was"unfortunate. You might have seen, with half an eye," he added,"that that's his line. Military genius, indeed! Pooh!"

"Dinner ready yet?" the Baron enquired, as he hurried into the room.

"Will be in a few minutes," the Vice-Warden replied. "Meanwhile, let'stake a turn in the garden. You were telling me," he continued,

as the trio left the house, "something about a great battle in whichyou had the command of the infantry--"

"True," said the Baron. "The enemy, as I was saying, far outnumbered us:but I marched my men right into the middle of--what's that?"the Military Hero exclaimed in agitated tones, drawing back behind theVice-Warden, as a strange creature rushed wildly upon them, brandishinga spade.

"It's only the Gardener!" the Vice-Warden replied in an encouraging tone."Quite harmless, I assure you. Hark, he's singing!Its his favorite amusement."

And once more those shrill discordant tones rang out:--

"He thought he saw a Banker's ClerkDescending from the bus:He looked again, and found it wasA Hippopotamus:'If this should stay to dine,' he said,'There won't be mutch for us!'"

Throwing away the spade, he broke into a frantic jig, snapping hisfingers, and repeating, again and again,

"There won't be much for us!There won't be much for us!"

[Image...It was a hippoptamus]

Once more the Baron looked slightly offended, but the Vice-Wardenhastily explained that the song had no allusion to him,and in fact had no meaning at all. "You didn't mean anything by it,now did you?" He appealed to the Gardener, who had finished his song,and stood, balancing himself on one leg, and looking at them, with hismouth open.

"I never means nothing," said the Gardener: and Uggug luckily came upat the moment, and gave the conversation a new turn.

"Allow me to present my son," said the Vice-warden; adding,in a whisper, "one of the best and cleverest boys that ever lived!I'll contrive for you to see some of his cleverness. He knows everythingthat other boys don't know; and in archery, in fishing, in painting,and in music, his skill is--but you shall judge for yourself.You see that target over there? He shall shoot an arrow at it.Dear boy,"he went on aloud, "his Adiposity would like to see you shoot.Bring his Highness' bow and arrows!"

Uggug looked very sulky as he received the bow and arrow, and preparedto shoot. Just as the arrow left the bow, the Vice-Warden trod heavilyon the toe of the Baron, who yelled with the pain.

"Ten thousand pardons! "he exclaimed. "I stepped back in my excitement.See! It is a bull's-eye!"

The Baron gazed in astonishment. "He held the bow so awkwardly,it seemed impossible!" he muttered. But there was no room for doubt:there was the arrow, right in the centre of the bull's-eye!

"The lake is close by," continued the Vice-warden. "Bring his Highness'fishing-rod!" And Uggug most unwillingly held the rod, and dangled thefly over the water.

"A beetle on your arm!" cried my Lady, pinching the poor Baron's armworse than if ten lobsters had seized it at once."That kind is poisonous," she explained. "But what a pity!You missed seeing the fish pulled out!"

An enormous dead cod-fish was lying on the bank, with the hook in itsmouth.

"I had always fancied," the Baron faltered, "that cod were salt-waterfish?"

"Not in this country," said the Vice-Warden. "Shall we go in?Ask my son some question on the way any subject you like!"And the sulky boy was violently shoved forwards, to walk at the Baron'sside.

"Could your Highness tell me," the Baron cautiously began,"how much seven times nine would come to?"

"Turn to the left!" cried the Vice-Warden, hastily stepping forwards toshow the way---so hastily, that he ran against his unfortunate guest,who fell heavily on his face.

"So sorry!" my Lady exclaimed, as she and her husband helped him to hisfeet again. "My son was in the act of saying 'sixty-three' as you fell!"

The Baron said nothing: he was covered with dust, and seemed much hurt,both in body and mind. However, when they had got him into the house,and given him a good brushing, matters looked a little better.

Dinner was served in due course, and every fresh dish seemed toincrease the good-humour of the Baron: but all efforts, to get him toexpress his opinion as to Uggug's cleverness, were in vain, until thatinteresting youth had left the room, and was seen from the open window,prowling about the lawn with a little basket, which he was filling withfrogs.

"So fond of Natural History as he is, dear boy!" said the dotingmother. "Now do tell us, Baron, what you think of him!"

"To be perfectly candid, said the cautious Baron, "I would like alittle more evidence. I think you mentioned his skill in--"

"Music?" said the Vice-Warden. "Why, he's simply a prodigy!You shall hear him play the piano? And he walked to the window."Ug--I mean my boy! Come in for a minute, and bring the music-masterwith you! To turn over the music for him," he added as an explanation.

Uggug, having filled his basket with frogs, had no objection to obey,and soon appeared in the room, followed by a fierce-looking little man,who asked the Vice-Warden "Vot music vill you haf?"

"The Sonata that His Highness plays so charmingly," said the Vice-Warden."His Highness haf not--" the music-master began, but was sharplystopped by the Vice-warden.

"Silence, Sir! Go and turn over the music for his Highness.My dear," (to the Wardeness) "will you show him what to do?And meanwhile, Baron, I'll just show you a most interesting map wehave--of Outland, and Fairyland, and that sort of thing."

By the time my Lady had returned, from explaining things to themusic-master, the map had been hung up, and the Baron was already muchbewildered by the Vice-Warden's habit of pointing to one place while heshouted out the name of another.

[Image...The map of fairyland]

My Lady joining in, pointing out other places, and shoutingother names, only made matters worse; and at last the Baron,in despair, took to pointing out places for himself, and feebly asked"Is that great yellow splotch Fairyland?"

"Yes, that's Fairyland," said the Vice-warden: "and you might as wellgive him a hint," he muttered to my Lady, "about going back to-morrow.He eats like a shark! It would hardly do for me to mention it."

His wife caught the idea, and at once began giving hints of the mostsubtle and delicate kind. "Just see what a short way it is back toFairyland! Why, if you started to-morrow morning, you'd get there invery little more than a week!"

The Baron looked incredulous. "It took me a full month to come," he said.

"But it's ever so much shorter, going back, you know!'

The Baron looked appealingly to the Vice-warden, who chimed in readily."You can go back five times, in the time it took you to come hereonce--if you start to-morrow morning!"

All this time the Sonata was pealing through the room. The Baron couldnot help admitting to himself that it was being magnificently played:but he tried in vain to get a glimpse of the youthful performer.Every time he had nearly succeeded in catching sight of him, either theVice-Warden or his wife was sure to get in the way, pointing out somenew place on the map, and deafening him with some new name.

He gave in at last, wished a hasty good-night, and left the room,while his host and hostess interchanged looks of triumph.

"Deftly done!" cried the Vice-Warden. "Craftily contrived!But what means all that tramping on the stairs?" He half-opened the door,looked out, and added in a tone of dismay, "The Baron's boxes are beingcarried down!"

"And what means all that rumbling of wheels?" cried my Lady. She peepedthrough the window curtains. "The Baron's carriage has come round!"she groaned.

At this moment the door opened: a fat, furious face looked in: a voice,hoarse with passion, thundered out the words "My room is full offrogs--I leave you!": and the door closed again.

And still the noble Sonata went pealing through the room: but it wasArthur's masterly touch that roused the echoes, and thrilled my verysoul with the tender music of the immortal 'Sonata Pathetique':and it was not till the last note had died away that the tired but happytraveler could bring himself to utter the words "good-night!" and toseek his much-needed pillow.